I have a counselor friend and mentor who is this super smart, incredibly wise man with a truly amazing skill of bringing simplicity to deep insights he shares. He reminds me of Jesus in that way: Very down to earth yet fully grounded in knowing how to practically weave profound truths into daily life.

One of the profound truths he’s shared with me is: Out with the bad…..in with the good.

At first glance it might not seem like a quote that would knock anyone over. But the more I’ve chewed on it, I see its relevance in more ways than I first thought.

One reason I love this quote is that it underscores the concept of replacement. We can’t move forward in new directions by merely choosing to walk away from something that isn’t good or healthy or productive. Instead, we have to intentionally move in a proactive direction by filling the space that once held the crap with what we do want there.

Secondly, it’s biblical! Notice the way that Paul says to “set your minds on things above, not on earthly things.” (Colossians 3:2). The only way not to focus on earthly things is to focus on things that are aligned with heaven. In other words, when what we do want to think about becomes the focus, it subsequently moves away that which doesn’t line up with our goals, our passion, our focus, our heart.

I have this thing I do sometimes with my eating disordered clients where I have them speak out loud the yucky words they hear in their heads. Then I tell them not to stop talking no matter what I do or say. I want them to expose the obsessive, negative, critical voice in their heads that is filled with lies in such a way that it externalizes it and exposes it all to the light.

So, for example, she (my client) says, “You are fat. You look terrible in your jeans. You shouldn’t even go out in public today because everyone will take one look at you and see how bad you look.”

But then here’s what I do. While she is saying all of that I talk in equal volume, maybe even a bit louder, demonstrating a way to assertively and aggressively attack the demeaning thoughts that automatically are there.

I will say something like, “Set your mind on things above, not on earthly things. I have been bought with a price. I am loved with an everlasting love. I am seated with Christ in heavenly places with all principalities and rulers of darkness in heavenly places under my feet.”

What always happens is that my client starts laughing while saying that I’m throwing her off.

I enthusiastically say, “Exactly!! You can’t think two opposite things at the same time. So to cancel out the one you don’t want, you have to make the thing you do want to focus on louder!”

The reality is that when we feed our minds with truth, then the lies have a harder time of staying in place. This isn’t a quick fix but is something that gets stronger with practice. As the truth of God’s Word replaces the automatic obsessive thoughts, we are essentially watching God’s mighty power that raised Jesus from the dead and that lives in us as Christians take over!

That’s how God’s replacement plan works. The bad can’t get out unless the good fills in the voids. It’s been fun for me to watch God’s truth replace the lies in my head. I honestly wake up every morning and lay there letting God remind me of truths in His Word.

Of course this implies that I’m reading and feeding on His Love Letter, memorizing verses so that I have recall when it gets intense.

This leads me to say that another powerful tool in doing this is to write verses on 3 x 5 cards. I read mine while I get ready in the mornings. Then I’m inviting God into my life process while on the go!

Have fun joining me today in letting God’s truth replace anything that isn’t of Him in your brain. Start today and you’ll see God’s Word being a sword in your hands to fight off the lies!

In this New Year I offer you this question…

Who am I?

When asked I respond, “I am outgoing. I am social. I am a morning person.” That is who I am. That is who I have always said I am. I am also very high energy and sensitive. I also often speak before I think, and can be quite stubborn. There. Are we done now?

Now who am I without the eating disorder?

That question was a frightening one for me. The answer was the same. “I am outgoing, social and a morning person.” Inside I knew, I was afraid, and my eating disorder gave me a false sense of safety.

I thought I knew who I was.
I also was sure that without the eating disorder to keep me numb that the me underneath wouldn’t be able to cope. Would feel too much, and hurt too much.

Stepping away from the person I thought I was into the person I wanted to be, and who God was molding me to be, was scary and it meant great risk.

Ahhh, but it is never really over is it? Not until we get to heaven.

Isn’t God always working on us?

“For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the LORD, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.” Jeremiah 29:11

It is easier to stay in our stuff even if it is killing us, because it is comfortable. And when we then ask that question, “Who am I? If I am honest, I sometimes feel like I don’t know!”

You don’t have to know.

Isn’t it more fun to think about who you want to be? Who you are becoming?
Maybe I am not a morning person.
Maybe I am more introverted as I grow older.
Maybe there is more to me than I even know.

We are not static if we are in relationship with God and self. Because relationships are not static.

Why not be curious?

I ask you and I ask me this question:

Who does GOD want you to be?
(P.S. the answer is not “perfect”)

What if, underneath the layer of who the world says you are, who you think you are, and who you want to be…God is saying, “But wait! If you would peel off the layers, if you would look underneath and inside, I have created someone beautiful and amazing and wonderful. The world needs to meet her/him.” This person doesn’t emerge from the ordinary living. No, this person emerges out of the refining fire.

And that is where I think we stop. That is where I think we all stop. No no, I don’t want the fire. I don’t want change. I don’t want uncertainty.

“Refining (or pruning), it’s one of God’s most important tools in growing me – and you, for that matter. In fact, some of the difficulty and loss that you’re experiencing right now may actually be your Heavenly Father cutting you back to help you grow. And the results are going to be far greater than they ever could have been if He left what He has been taking away.” Excerpt from Ron Hutchraft Ministries

I was teaching this to the patients the other day and had this (what I am writing here) revelation of my own. Often they teach me as much as I teach them.

I ask those struggling with eating disorders to think of who they are without the eating disorder. Sometimes they can come up with who they think they are, but it is mixed with fear of who they might be. And then they say with eyes wide in fear, “What if without ED I am worthless, nothing, fat, lazy?” So it leaves them stuck. Stuck in fear. Stuck in the What If?

How will you know for sure if you don’t try?

But what if we looked at it with a new angle. Instead of “who am I” ask the question “Who do I want to be?”

“Who does GOD want me to be?”

So I wrote a list of my own.
 
I want to be adventurous, I want to be challenged, I want to be used by God, I want to be passionate, and I want to be faithful.

Won’t you write your own list too?

Then I wrote another list because if these are words describe who I want to be, then what kinds of situations do I need to put my feet into in order to let God transform me into this person?

Does the list look like this? Organized, scheduled, rigid days. Plans of next steps in my life, where I will be in 1 year, 5, 10? Routine, to-do lists and comfort. Lots and lots of comfort.

Not that any of these things are bad. Please don’t put a judgment on them. But, are these things going to lead me to adventure, challenge, being used by God, and the most difficult one …faithful.

No.

Rigidity does not lead us to the adventure. AND an eating disorder keeps you rigid.

I read a quote somewhere that says, “The willow is flexible and survives the storm as it bends with the wind, whereas the more rigid oak is more likely to crack.”

I want to be the willow! Am I living like the willow?

So we are at a crossroads aren’t we? How do we do this? How do we become the person we want to be, the person God wants us to be while also staying comfortable?

We don’t. We have to step out, into the fire. And if we are willing through prayer and others holding us as mat carriers, we WILL emerge on the other side full of life, life breathed in us by God. Not perfect. Not exact. But FULL!

That sounds way more fun does it not?

Now we make a third list.

This is the list of how you are going to put yourself in situations that force you to face this head on. Then you ask God and others to help you do this!

Here are some examples; if you want to become a person who is adventurous…then make a goal to do something adventurous. Something you have never done before.

Something out of your comfort zone.

If you long for deep relationships and want to be a person who is a good friend, than take that risk and call someone up. Meet for coffee.

If you want to be less rigid, do something spontaneous. Each day, look at the list and ask God and ask yourself – “How can I place myself in situations that will challenge and lead me to become more of the person I want to be!”

You see… Peter couldn’t have walked on water unless he FIRST got in the boat.

“But Jesus immediately said to them: “Take courage! It is I. Don’t be afraid.”

“Lord, if it’s you,” Peter replied, “tell me to come to you on the water.”

“Come,” he said.

Then Peter got down out of the boat, walked on the water and came toward Jesus. But when he saw the wind, he was afraid and, beginning to sink, cried out, “Lord, save me!”

Immediately Jesus reached out his hand and caught him. “You of little faith,” he said, “why did you doubt?” Matthew 14:27-31

Get in the boat friends. Then TAKE COURAGE! Or first, get yourself to the dock! No one changes all at once, or becomes this person tomorrow. It is a process, but why not start it now? What are you waiting for?

But don’t we want to be like the willow, changing growing, learning, living?

I DO!

God wants to grow us.

Let go of the chains that hold you stiff like an old oak tree and shed the layers of old habitual patterns that keep you stale and stuck.

This is the year!

Perfect time to think about this in your own life and to move towards becoming the person who GOD wants you to be.

I challenge you!

“When hard pressed, I cried to the LORD; he brought me into a spacious place. The LORD is with me; I will not be afraid. What can mere mortals do to me?” Psalm 118:5-6 NIV

There is such an emphasis on perfection in our culture. I see it every day, I FEEL it every day. The saddest part about this perfection demand – is how early it begins. My sweet babies in my classroom are just 3 years old. They are being dressed up, taught to excel, and forced to perform. Moms are constantly comparing and forcing their children’s accomplishments to other moms, usually with the child in earshot. It is heart breaking. Some days it is sickening. How did we become a culture where it is acceptable for a 3 year old to place value on words like ugly, fat, perfect, and pretty? Why is playing trains and counting to 10 just for fun, not acceptable? Forcing children to perfection these days doesn’t simply involve having the perfect body. No, that isn’t enough anymore. The culture is feeding our children messages that now you have to be the thinnest, the smartest, you have to play every sport well, and you have to get into the best college… and you have to come out of the womb doing all of those things. There is hardly room to breathe, explore, grow, thrive, become a person. There is no room for children to become the person God has created them to be.

And I don’t have a solution to this rapidly growing problem. It seems that each year my kids come to me smarter, more put together, already asking about private school admissions. And all I can do is create an environment that encourages exploration. An environment that allows the child to explore his/ her interests, styles, and areas they are confident in. My hope as a teacher is that each child will feel loved and adored even when they can’t answer my reading comprehension question, even when they don’t pass a skills check, and even when they mess up and break something or take a toy from a friend.

I wonder what would happen if our kids could just be kids. Would the insane rate of eating disorders, suicide, and drug dependency decline? Would our children be happy and responsive and creative?
I found this amazing article today and I thought my FINDINGbalance friends would be interested in reading it. Jeff Lawrence gives us some wonderful tips on “How to talk to little girls”, and how instilling the gospel that they are loved because they are created is so much more important than teaching them that their worth is NOT based on appearance, performance, or intelligence.

http://jeffdlawrence.com/2011/12/23/some-thoughts-on-how-to-talk-to-little-girls/

It has forced me to think about how I talk to children in general, and I am challenged to focus on being loved because Jesus says you are. We all need to be told the truth of grace, and 3 years old is not too little to know how much you are adored, and 30 years old is not old to be reminded that you are adored.

For the past few years I’ve had this tradition around the first of January where I ask God to give me a word that becomes “my word” for the year. One year my word was “yes” and another it was “more.” It has been fun to hold to the specific words throughout the years and then look back at the end of December to see how God brought the word for that year to life.

So in keeping with tradition, the word for this year is….(drumroll please)…open.

At first I was excited about the word because I love the way it stands aligned to concepts of surrender and obedience to God. But the more I thought about it, it seems less about movement and more about being positioned ready to receive. It’s not really a passive word but is definitely less action-oriented than words I’ve had in the past.

Then this morning I went on a run and was talking with God about all the losses that I’ve had in 2011…loss of a ministry position as a worship leader in my church (God led me to give it up in order to pursue The Abba Project more intently) as well as the loss of a significant friendship in my life. And while I was pondering the losses, I sensed God dropping two words into my mind:

Blank canvas.

I immediately perked up because I knew He was right. By taking things away, it leaves room for the new. I recalled that God never takes things away without putting something better in that place if I am open to what He wants to do (as opposed to me scrambling to cram something in the empty space just so I have less discomfort).

I got this idea then to take a large blank canvas that was in my closet and to paint one stroke on it every day of 2012 so that by the end of the year I will have a whole painting. I started today and here’s what it looks like so far on this 3rd day of January (not real impressive yet so I’ll have to take another picture in December for you to see):

Obviously there’s no way that I can predict how it’s going to turn out, but as I paint one color every day, by the year’s end I will hopefully have a great end product! It will serve as a great metaphor of being open to what God has up His sleeve for me in 2012 as I let Him paint His picture on the blank canvas of my life.

I’d love you to join me in embracing your word for this year. Feel free to choose one of mine or to ask God to whisper to your spirit the word He has for you for the next 12 months. Then write here what word you will claim as your own in 2012!

Happy New Year!

This was written by one of the amazing nurses I work with and I just had to share it with you. I hope you enjoy it!
Xo
Lee

***

It was time to prepare for our annual Christmas talent show. Homemade signs with trees and stars decked the hallways, inviting those not “faint of heart,” (i.e. those with good vital signs) to sing, perform, or share, by coming to the front of the room where all gather with piano lid propped open, black and white keys ready to pronounce festivities.

This invitation was to some of the most gifted I have known those held back by believing the unrelenting blur of chants and murmurs that speak dissatisfaction with every breath – dissatisfaction with not only with their bodies, but their lives. This is the time of year where eyes swell and tears fall, just to know that they are doomed to spend yet another Christmas in eating disorder treatment, treatment that tries to rescue them from the Grim Reaper and open their eyes to a life that is not bound by numbers, weights, and calories.

“Should I sing?” asked one far from home, timid, hurt, who had already endured so much in her short lifespan. This ponytail white, with angel voice, who loved to sing and perform, who could forget her past and take flight to heights unknown when she lifted her voice on high. She knew His voice, yet struggled to detach from her inner voices which declared her “unfit, unloved, and unforgiving.” She had been tricked into thinking that love comes from betraying what she knew to be right and she had paid the price, not once, but twice by wolves dressed in sheep’s clothing. Her arms, a canvas crisscrossed with intricate detail, cut deep and healed over. This was a constant reminder of what she felt she deserved, somehow she believed she was a disappointment to all and bereft of human love to hold her.

“Oh yes, you should sing!” I chimed, as I opened the door to the shower room. This was one of the only quiet places, void of the chatter of others, filled with curtains and mirrors and echoes and toiletries. It provided the perfect backdrop for her practice, where she decided to embrace HIS song, HIS story, and HIS beauty coming as a babe to redeem us. She chose, “O Holy Night”, my favorite Christmas song….

Today is the day of the talent show as she begged for one last practice. We ventured down to the open piano lid with the black and white keys and I struck for her a starting note. She wondered if she had the courage to bring this song to life, to share His story with those searching for completeness of soul. “I don’t know if I can do it,” she said, head hanging low. “Remember,” I said, “this isn’t about you, this is about Him!”

It was time, and she was motioned to the front, in a room full of willows and whispers, shadows and figures awaiting her breath, her voice, her song. She glanced at me and shook her head. I grabbed her hand and whispered,

 “This is for Him!”

I hit the C, and she closed her eyes, and in angelic tone, sang a cappella as she raised her voice to her Maker. I watched as this ponytail white’s message transformed the room to a stable, to a cross, to the promise of hope:

Truly He taught us to love one another,
His law is love and His gospel is peace.
Chains he shall break, for the slave is our brother.
And in his name all oppression shall cease.
Sweet hymns of joy in grateful chorus raise we,
With all our hearts we praise His holy name.
Christ is the Lord! Then ever, ever praise we,
His power and glory ever more proclaim!
His power and glory ever more proclaim!

My eyes flooded with tears, as His message was proclaimed promising peace to the broken and freedom from the chains that hold us. I whispered gratitude that His message could be so clear to both me and those with the unrelenting voices. Not one flaw, her inflection and fortitude grew with each stanza.

As she finished, there was silence. The room filled with the holy echoes of her song.

Then, with applause that raised the rooftop, she smiled and I embraced this ponytail white. I stood in awe of what just happened, knowing God is here…God is always here, we just need to open our eyes and see, and I whispered to heaven,

“Lord, this one was for you!”

Here we are at Christmastime and truth be told, this tends to be the hardest time of year for more people than not.

For some it’s the fact that it’s super challenging because of all the food and parties.
For some it’s the fact that they have to see family and interact with dysfunction galore (did I really just say that out loud?!).
For some it’s the fact that they don’t have family around and feel all alone.
For some it’s the fact that everyone else seems to have a boyfriend or girlfriend.
For some it’s the fact that they will attend Christmas parties but will feel “less than” because of comparisons that will scream in their heads.

I can assure you that I’ve felt every one of these things at one time or another. Really.

The fact that I’ve been higher body weight for the majority of my 20’s and been single now into my 50’s and had family challenges here and there and struggled with self-esteem on and off through the years, I feel better in knowing that others have felt the same way and can relate.

I’ve found that when I’m feeling ugly or insecure or unsure or lonely, the biggest thing I need to help me regroup is what I refer to as a “with person.” I need someone who is with me, in my corner, on my side. I need someone to feed me truth to counter the lies.

I’m comforted by the fact that when God the Father sent His son to earth, He named Him Emmanuel, which means “God with us.” God chose to send a part of Himself to come alongside us, to be in our corner, to be on our side.

This means that we’re never alone—-not at Christmas parties or when engaging with tough family members we have to see this time of year or whether we’re married or single.

This means we’re loved unconditionally by our Abba Father and by Jesus, and as part of their family we have a forever place of belonging regardless of what our earthly family does or doesn’t look like.

My Christmas wish for you is that you will feel and truly know that God is your day-in-and-day-out-never-goes-away with person. You have a Father in heaven who is cheering you on and a friend in Jesus who is standing by you at your side.

And as we head into the new year, I will be writing more about themes tying to dads and parenting, as well as the importance of having needs met by Abba Father. By now you all know how passionate I am about inspiring dads to turn their hearts towards their children, and more specifically, their daughters. I am excited to continue networking with FINDINGbalance in that venture and am grateful for my ongoing friendship with Constance!

May this Christmas season be one where you experience God’s with presence in ways like never before! Merry Christmas!!

“We stretch forth our hands and take not only God but a portion of each other’s burdens. Life is hard enough. No one should eat alone.” Jesus, My Father, the CIA Agent and Me.

At the end of the movie Into The Wild, the main character, while dying alone, has an epiphany and says, “Happiness is not real unless it is shared.”

I received very happy news yesterday and I didn’t hesitate to call a friend. Isn’t that usually our first response?

What about when we are sad? Where do we go when we are sad? Do you run to the phone to call a friend or do you do like I so often have done. Hold it in, stuff it away, hide it.

Recently I was forced to face some sadness buried deep in my own soul. It had been covered and ignored and once I allowed it to be set free, slain me to the couch. This sadness a mere human emotion, I was determined not to be undone by it. I could handle it. There was no running from it, like in the past, no shoveling it under the carpet. I got that part down; it is the next part, the reaching out part that was hard.

Here it was, those tears, that now soggy face, me fully emotional and fully alive. Crying out to God. But only God.

Why don’t I share my pain too? I wondered silently as I wrapped myself in my soft cuddly blanket. I knew I needed more. I couldn’t handle it alone. Yes, God was there with me, but doesn’t He CALL us to reach out. To be in community with others, sharing our truest selves? Yes.

I needed mat carriers. People who could carry me when I lost strength.

“Some men arrived carrying a paraplegic on a stretcher. They were looking for a way to get into the house and set him before Jesus. When they couldn’t find a way in because of the crowd, they went up on the roof, removed some tiles, and let him down in the middle of everyone, right in front of Jesus. Impressed by their bold belief, he said, ‘Friend, I forgive your sins.’”  Luke 5:18-20 (MSG)

Heavy salt-filled waves of sadness rapped on me over and over. I thought of the friends, the ones who carried the paraplegic on a stretcher. The ones who took him to see Jesus.

Without breath the sobs beat on me until I was unable to do anything but surrender to the ache in my heart, and the hurt that spread right down to my pinkie toe. And I picked up my phone, (because really isn’t your phone always sitting by your side?) And I called a friend.

One who would pick up my mat.

The part about this story in Luke that I love so much is that the friends didn’t just carry the guy. They went to the extreme to help. They made a hole in the roof! Can you imagine? Why would they do that?

To make themselves look good? No.

Because helping others is a gift and when a friend comes to you in need, wouldn’t you do whatever it takes to help them? Even if it means ripping that roof right off and hoisting them down to meet Jesus. Yes!

Then why, if I know this, do I find myself so afraid sometimes to ask for help? To dial that number, to say, “hey can you talk?”

You see the guy in the movie Into the Wild had it all wrong. He thought he could find complete fulfillment in nature, in solitude. But I truly believe we are created to be in relationship. In relationship with God and with others.

That means allowing people to carry the mat for you when you need it. Chris (the kid in the movie) realized this important lesson tragically while he was alone and dying.

I am grateful I reached out. I will do it again. Despite my stubbornness to pull up my big girl pants and be strong, I will call my mat carriers. I will allow them to help me when I am sad, when I am afraid, when I am scared.

Won’t you? Won’t you reach out to your mat carriers?

There actually is JOY in sharing it with others. Of letting others carry you during your pain. This time when I was deeply sad, I sat with it AND I shared it. I let those in my life who I have deep trust for, into my pain. And they carried me.

A childhood friend all the way in Arizona offered me the gift of giggles during my tears.

Another sent me encouraging texts of scripture.

And my husband? He just allowed me to cry and rest and be sad.

The healing came quicker this way because these people were the salve on my wounds.

Let them in dear friends. Those people standing on the fringes of your life waiting for you to invite them in.

You need them. We all do.

Life is lived in community. The good, the bad, the messy. All of it, in community.
xo
Lee

Every once in awhile there is a speaker who communicates truth in such a way that it literally touches a core place inside the listener. Larry Crabb recently was one of those truth-speakers into my life.

Larry’s talk on gender began with defining terms as he said, “I don’t think you women are necessarily going to like the meaning of the word for female, but here it is. Nequebah, the Hebrew word for woman, literally means punctured, bored through.” Hmmm….He was right.

He then took us to II Kings 12:9 where King Joash commissioned Jehoiada, the high priest, to “nequebah” the lid of a box for use as a container of money for repairing the temple. The box was opened and released as a vessel that was intended for God’s purposes. Larry further explained that “nequebah” means “to be opened while arranging yourself consistently for a larger purpose than you.”

Bridging this concept then to Jesus on the cross, Larry noted that it was literally this act of being punctured and bored through that demonstrated Jesus’ openness to God’s larger purpose both in Him and through Him. Wow!

As I have been pondering this truth that Jesus chose to truly identify with my femaleness when He suffered and died by allowing Himself to be punctured and bored through, I still am overcome with emotion as I soak in the reality that Christ willingly chose to align Himself with me as a woman by letting Himself suffer in this way. Jesus voluntarily allowed Himself to be punctured, to be opened up, to be bored through, all for His Father’s purposes. In that way He fully identified with me as a woman according to this definition.

This changes everything for me because it underscores that Jesus really “gets” this part of me, this female part of me. Now in a greater way than ever before I treasure the fact that Jesus backed up His words with His actions toward me, a woman whom He made in His likeness.

The reality for me as a woman who has been taken advantage of and overpowered by more than one man is to activate my instinctive act of self-protection where I put up a wall out of fear that I will be “punctured” again. Sometimes the walls are literal where I hide out and create physical distance whereas at other times I build an emotional wall that reflexively pops up where those on the other side of my self-made wall can feel my coldness or hardness as I react.

The truth is that in those times where I feel threatened as a result of someone activating or bumping up against my deep-seeded fears, I am tapping into my core terror of being punctured, destroyed, crushed, or bored through. I can tell you honestly that I am not intending to be brash or harsh in those instances but when I am triggered, my openness then closes off. It is in those moments that I am in need of God’s touch on my life at the core of my being so that I can stay open to His purposes and not only reactive to those around me.

As Larry said, “a beautiful woman is so at rest in God’s delight in her that she enjoys her undamageable beauty such that she invites others to connect and relate openly not guardedly, invitingly not controllingly, courageously not defensively—to encourage another to be consumed by God’s beauty at any cost to herself so that she can reveal God to His community.”

I truly long to be a woman who is fully alive with an open heart and open life, all the while inviting others to do the same. This reality brings some purpose to the pain because it’s redemption in motion. Then in the process of it all I get to be myself, an imperfect yet willing-to-be-punctured woman who is open to being a feminine redeemed image bearer!

Come on girls….let’s continue to embrace our femininity as vulnerably open yet passionately bold women who are fully alive for God for His purposes!

Are you so caught up in the food, or the family drama, or the fear that you are missing the POINT of THANKSgiving?

“Don’t let your aversion become a perversion of the REAL version.” I heard someone say recently. Don’t we do that, so often we twist up the real meanings of Holidays because of a myriad of things like bad memories, annoying people, or just pure sadness. I encourage you despite how you are feeling, to TRY to focus on gratitude this season. How?

• Make a list every day of things you are grateful for. (Try to get to a 1,000 like Ann did in her book One Thousand Gifts.)
• Send hand written letters to those you want to express gratitude for.
• Try setting your phone alarm and every hour and find one thing to thank God for.

Do you have any ideas you would like to share? I would love to hear them! Post them in the comments here

There is a healing that takes place in your body when you express gratitude. Won’t you offer gratitude, not just on the actual holiday, but during the entire Holiday season?

“Feeling gratitude and not expressing it is like wrapping a present and not giving it.”
William Arthur Ward

“Gratitude is the memory of the heart, but gratitude is not only the memories of our heart; gratitude is a memory of God’s heart and to thank is to REMEMBER God.” Ann Voskamp author of One Thousand Gifts.

Please take time to watch this video to help reframe your mind about what the REAL version of this holiday season is all about!

I am grateful for you all. Thank you for reading this blog
Lee

Psalm 136:3-7 (NIV)
Give thanks to the Lord of lords:
 His love endures forever.
To him who alone does great wonders,
 His love endures forever.
Who by his understanding made the heavens,
 His love endures forever.
Who spread out the earth upon the waters,
 His love endures forever.
Who made the great lights –
 His love endures forever.

For more help on having an eating disorder free holiday click here.

In an attempt to stay thankful, mindful of blessings, all things positive, this week… I have had a hard time since Thanksgiving traditions will not be kept this year. I thought blogging about something meaningful would help. And I had a humbling experience when I heard this song.

Happy is the heart that still feels pain,
Darkness drains and light will come again.
Swing open up your chest and let it in,
Just let the love, love, love begin.

Ironic, kind of. Unexpectedly they cracked open my mother’s chest 3 months ago exactly. They fixed her heart. They made her heart so that blood can flow through her body. They saved her life. And now, she is back to work, she is working out, she is having fun. My mom is still here. Five emergency bypasses and she is still here. Her chest was literally opened up and I believe that love flooded her heart. How could she not have felt it with all of the people by her side. By my side. By the side of my sister.

At her weakest moment she had no choice but to let the love in. Peter’s family visited. It made our hearts happy. In the midst of such pain. Such fear. Love was evident. SO many people showed us love. And we had to accept it. My mom had no choice. We had no choice but to hope that if the worst should happen, someone might love us enough to step in.

The song continues on to say:

Everybody knows the love
Everybody holds the love,
Everybody folds for love.
Everybody feels the love,
Everybody steals the love,
Everybody heals with love

Everybody heals with love. And today. On this first day of thankfulness. I am not only grateful for my wonderful mom who is alive. But I am thankful for the need to love, the need to be loved, I am thankful for moments this year that have forced me into a state of vulnerability so much so that I could only accept love instead of push it away.

 EVERYBODY, EVERYBODY. heals with love.
 (Song is Ingrid Michaelson Everybody)